A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words: The Death of America's Education System

As you loyal readers likely know, I, Boots himself, possibly am an honorary Doctor of Photojournalism. For my thesis, I followed a freshmen at a prestigious university for one day. What you see are the disturbing images captured in 24 hours of a young creature spiraling out of control, as he morphs into a degenerate drinker and sex crazed maniac, a trend that has become all too frequent among the students in America's college campuses. While my thesis captures only one particular student at one school, without a doubt a similar cases can be found on any given college campus (except BYU and Oral Roberts). I present to you my doctoral thesis- Monkeybusiness at University. Prepare yourself gentle soul....
(Mother, Son, & Monkey) Monkey arrives on campus, a young man hungry for knowledge. This takes on a whole different meaning in the hours to come as monkey starts "dropping knowledge" on sexy co-eds.



(God, County, Notre Dame or Sex, Drugs, Rock & Roll) Our young idealist thinks he has found a home in the world of academia.




(Quality Time) Monkey and his new best friend decide that roommates the nap together, can also leave the door open when they take a crap together.




(Slippery Slope) Monkey's first beer at college. If only they taught a class on moderation.





(Eat Shit Excess) Monkey learns more about the properties of alcohol in his first week in college than he would've in all the chemistry classes he'll never make it to. Truancy does not rank high on the list of dangerous habits monkey picks up.

(Trouble Ahead, Trouble Behind) Monkey in his drunken haze wanders in to what appears to be the residence of two respectable young ladies. Doesn't it look like they're all having a fun sexy time?

(Protection?) You must have seen this coming dear readers.

(Two of a Good Thing is Better than One) Well, that certainly didn't take long.




(St Edward) Ahh monkey, St. Edward may hold a dormitory in his palm, but you had the world in you hour hands.



(The End) No, monkey did not die. But this photo taken twenty four hours after he arrived on campus would be an all too familiar position for our subject. Monkey would go on to accumulate more STI's his first semester than he would course credits. The only thing he spent more time on than drugs and loose women was academic probation. Monkey graduated six years after entering college, at which time he moved to Chicago and took a job at an architectural tour boat company.

"We are We are the youth of the nation"

-P.O.D.