Wikipedia Tidbit of the Week!

Lester Hayes (born January 22, 1955) is a former professional American football player for the National Football League Oakland/LA Raiders.
Hayes was commonly referred to as "Lester the Molester" (a nickname he detested) and "the Judge." A big Star Wars fan, during pregame interviews for Super Bowl XVIII he declared himself the "only true Jedi" in the NFL.[1] He was known for his Bump and run coverage style, and for using Stickum before it was banned in a rule bearing his name.

Now they've got those gloves.

400th Post!

Sorry we missed September, guys.

FRANKFORT — Another anonymous audio taping of Lt. Gov. Daniel Mongiardo has popped up on YouTube, the third since last month in which Mongiardo speaks ill of his boss, Gov. Steve Beshear.

On the latest taping, Monggiardo said his relationship with the governor is like "being married to a whore. What can you do?"

Cleveland, City Under Siege

Go bears!

Keeping it going

The D10 turns 19 months old!

Things Bothering Me At The Moment

At the Workplace

i. The new fad seems to be people separated by one cube or so calling each other on the phone and then giggling at the novelty of 'reaching out and touching someone' instead of, you know reaching out and touching someone. Frankly, the whole sham has all the creative insight of when an 8 year-old pretends to drive a parked car or that the pretzel rod he's smoking is really a cigar. At least when the kid does it it's original and cute.

ii. The gentlemen a few feet from me has spent roughly an hour per day over the past week watching Schoolhouse Rock videos on his computer. Like, the same one over and over and over again. Presumably, he's counting this as his lunch hour, or maybe we have some really, really important work coming up on Interjections!. I'm not one for becoming embroiled in negative zeitgeist, but is "being annoying" a proper cause for termination?


This place looks fun

D10 Fitness Challenge Update

D10 Fitness Challenge Kudos to Mr. Onni Hart for his heroic Memorial Day '09 run at eating 15 La Pasadita burritos in 24 hours. He made it to 9. God rest his soul

KPax: Vulcon Series: Warrior Bot: The Silken Bot: Prologue: Fellowship of the Bot

Oh, hello. I did not see you there. It seems the agents have taken a religous respite for their holiday feast of Toshiba. I was taking this chance to update the manuscripts that will save our world. Why don't you sit down with me and we will share a tale, and maybe a hug? Close your weary eyes and sigh, and I will tell you of lighter times. . . .

---------------------------------------------------------------

Long has it been known that the good folkery of Azural lived not for the shine of gold, nor the silvery sparkle of silver, but rather they made their livelihood of the beautiful cloths which they always traded and sometimes wore. Suredly all know that such splendid cloth can only be spun by the most elegant of Giant SilkWorms. Oh, how Azural had the finest. It is said that The Giant SilkWorm of Azural once produced a single thread of silk no less than the length of 175 tall men, or 215 of standard height. Lo, what a thread it was! The shiftless cloth merchants of Aquas paid mountains of gold for the magnificent garments fashioned from the thread.

The Merchant Trading Palace, in Happier Days.

In the days just after KPax beat back the forces of Shirella, bringing victory the War of Power, unrest crept into Azural once more. The women and children wept once more, for the Giant SilkWorm of Azural had been stolen! The giant worm had always been closely guarded by the forces of Azural, but some wicked evil had conspired to steal her under the duress of the War. The merchants of Aquas and the cloth makers of Azural feared there business was over. The Azurali and all other of the known world longed for the stylish garbs they once adorned.

"Good King Keestos, we beg you to undo this injustice done to us. Bring back our magnificent worm, that she way threaden from her supple spindle once more." Cried the people of Azural.

To this the great King could only lament, "Good people, I know not what has become of her, and know not how to get her back. Perhaps we must abandon of our tastes and cast aside our stunning dress, for more modest, simple garb." This of course hurt the king more than his people, for Keestos had always paid much mind to his wardrobe of metallic purple and lavender. It appeared as if hope was lost?"

Inside the mountain Keep of Cleveland, DeMarr, clad in his light green silken tunic and and dark yellow-brown scarf (it is said although the leaves may fall and winter dry the earth, wherever DeMarr did go, so too the colours of autumn) pondered the fate of Azural:

"KPax, all is lost. Although we won the struggle verse evil, what joy is there in a world not shinning of beautiful colours?? To this the loyal mountain of DeMarr's creation bellowed, "ALL IS NEVER LOST. AS LONG AS ONE HEART MAY YEARN FOR PEACE, HOPE SPRINGS ANEW."

At this you may wonder how it is that a Warrior Bot may speak with such prophetic prose. To that, the answer is clear. DeMarr programmed KPax with an awesome talent for oration. At that time however he still struggled as a conservationist with mere mortals, a flaw that plagued him for time to come, but that story is for another day. Back to the Keep of Cleveland.

"How is it you can be so calm, Bot Warrior, when the people of Azural suffer so?"

The Mountain Keep of Cleveland, where DeMarr gave birth to hope.

"I WILL GO IN FORCE TO SEARCH AND DESTROY THE EVIL USURPER OF THE WORM, AND I WILL RETURN HER TO SPINDLE FOR YOU GOOD PEOPLE ONCE MORE. BUT I CANNOT DO IT ALONE."

DeMarr made haste to Castle Keestos to tell him of their plan. When he found the King, Keestos was sitting atop his golden throne, clad in a grossly outdated checkered frock, truly a miserable site.

"Keestos," (the King and biologist had always been on informal, friendly terms) "what is this that you wear? You must change at once, if the people see you they will know we have fallen on truly horrid times."

"Oh DeMarr, but we have. The great worm is gone and lost and so too are we."

"No good Keestos, not if we send KPax Vulcon Series: The Warrior Bot, he will find and return our worm. But he must go forth in a stealthy quest party, that this plan may work. Who else can we send?"

The king sat in thought for some time, until he looked up with a smile.

"We have KPax: Vulcon Series: The Warrior Bot who is ever strong and true; with him we must only send those we know to be of true and loyal heart. We will send forth a fellowship of five. KPax the Vulcon Series, Gleek, Hoger the Ogre, and Lord Baron's two sons, Ugg and Narb. Together the five should thwart the our evil foes."

DeMarr was unsure.

"With respect good king, Gleek is certainly an affable lad, but a warrior? And Hoger is certainly strong as any, but does he lack the wits? And the brothers Baron are certainly clever, but are they not delinquents?"

"You have spoken true, alone they have their talents and banes, but together they will be a group fit to task."

The Boy Prince Gleek Ugg and Narb, the Warrior Twins Hogre the Ogre, with Watermelon

At that DeMarr saw why all of the realm knew Keestos to be the wisest of Kings.

The next morn the fellowship congregated. From most accounts the meating of the soon to be fabled consort was quite awkward. Naturally Gleek attempted to lighten the mood with one of his infamous quips; and history was made.

"Greetings KPax:Vulcon Series. I never imagined I'd bot into you this day." mused Gleek.

"I DO NOT PROCESS YOUR TRANSMISSION YOUNG MASTER GLEEK." KPax retorted.

A flustered Gleek could only stammer, "It was but a jest."

"I LEARN THAT HUMAN COMMUNICATION IS NOT LIMITED TO DATA. ALSO MUST WE COMMUNE TO LET US KNOW OUR OWN SOULS AND PROCESSING UNITS. I LOOK FORWARD TO US HAVING MADE HUMOUR TO ME SOON OR IN TH FUTURE DURING THIS PERILOUS JOURNEY." and so the Bot too had shown his wit and rancor.

I saw this made history, because it did. KPax bonded together a group of the most different of characters to be heroes of their age and ages to come. All will now know of the many daring feats they accomplished and the passing in battle of not too few of their own. In time you will know many of their quests but we will start with this one the first.

From the squar where they shared laughs they went forward. . .

KPax: Vulcon Series: The Warrior Bot: Fiat Botica

Long ago, in the many distant days before our age
There existed a great kingdom of gold and peace.
Happy did the men of this land live,
at peace with the animals and women around them.
As sure as the dragon swims through the river of time, so too did these able men learn their craft and live by the Code of the Elders.

Little did they know that in the East, there dwelled a gathering threat that would soon sweep through their little play world as an evil wind through a delicious orchard.
Little did they know that time immemorial had given rise to the Band of the Red Claw of Gorgoroth.


Born of the sinister machinations of the seductive Empress Shirella, the Red Claw were a greedy lot who wanted not but to bask in the rich resources and cloths of the realm. Like the stealthy stalk of the lion among prey, so too did the Red Claw of Gorgoroth make their war upon the good people of Azural.



The forces of King Keetsos were sorry to flee in the face of this reckless evil, as the Red Claw ravaged the people of Azural, slaying their children, defiling their women, and confiscating their many fine cloths for trade with the shiftless merchants of Aquas.

The Grand Council of Keetsos called before it the many sages of the realm, to find what might be done against the sorrowful flains of the inisidious Sirella. One of these sages was the famed biologist DeMarr, Lord Inspirator of the Second Age. Many times had DeMarr's pith and wit come to the aid of the King of Azural, but now his exhortations were falling on deaf ears, like water breaking on the lid of a shut jar.

"I tell you now, King Keetsos, as I have given my body and fluid for your city, trust in me to unleash the craft of the Vulcon Series upon the floding minions of the claw!"

At the mention of the sacred gift of the Vulcon, King Keetsos lifted his arm, and clutchingly stopped the hand of the maiden running the Royal comb through his long and legendary beard. With an air of royalty that only true Kings and those like kings might have, he said, "DeMarr, together we have fought many battles, and stretched in many ways, but you know as well as I that the Vulcon cannot be unleashed using the powers of Azural. We have no soul pure enough to entrust with such power. Should we make a man of Azural one with the Vulcon, we would hazard living at the knees of a Bot God. We cannot give the power of the Warrior Bot to a mortal soul. With the corruption of such boundless will, We have no idea what he will believe in, we have no idea what he will fight for."

And with the tearful flight of DeMarr, all hope seemed lost.

Lost, that is, until the salvation of this world was born.

With the smoothing of his body commencing once more, little could King Keetsos have known that the life of his kingdom had been spared by the birth of a simple boy in the fabled fortress city of Lux.

ENTER KANIECKI

A fair and kindly boy, Kaniecki had been known by the people of Lux to be a blessed crystal of the Creator. Strong and erect his powers were.

It was said that his mother was a volcano, and his father the sun, and looking at the trials of this boy-prince of the east, the people of Lux said that if this legend were true, they knew one thing of this boy Kaniecki: He looked like his father.

So fair and rich was the hair of Kaniecki that it was fed to the sickly children of the city. So blue his piercing eyes that many livestock vanished at the sight of them. So great was Kaniecki's power thoguht to be, that it was said that he could inhale the air of the earth and exhale the soul of a man sitting in a faraway land.

One morn, as Kaniecki saw the smoking ruins of the Red Claw's work rising against the new sun, the Golden One took up with great haste and fled to his workshop with his tools. When he emerged, the Creator breathed a sigh of relief, for Kaniecki had emerged with a gift: the tested Battle Armor of his Father, the Sun.

And so the flag of Azural was taken up by Lord Kaniecki, and lo had the Wars of Power begun.

Nowhere near or under the sun's watchful eye could Shirella and the Claw flee from the wrath of Kaniecki. For three seasons did he stab and thrust with his mighty rod, until finally he was readied for the Great Conflict of Gorgoroth, to end this deluge of our age.

Shattering was Kaniecki's power that day. Great was his effort. So strong was he, that sweat poured off his brow and fleshy underarms like the rains of the great Boggy Marsh.

When the day appeared won, Kaniecki was felled by the simplest of things: a poisoned lance. So cunning was the Seductress Shirella, that even while she feigned death, and Kaniecki posed with his musculature above her for the forces of good, that she pricked him with her nimble Flint, and lo the day was lost.

Seeing their Captain fall, the forces of good crumbled once more. Panic struck over the land, and the Armies of Azural scattred like children from the staff of a raging Innskeeper.

At this moment, when the light of good had been extinguished, slowly did a rustle on the battlefield emerge. The wily sage DeMarr, crusting from anguish and unwash, had found the body of the Prince Kaniecki, and made off with it to his mountain sancturary of Cleveland for the last best hope of good in this world.

Quickly now did the Red Claw revamp their oppression on the freedom of Azural. After but two tidings of the Diamond Sea, the Siege of the Imperial Citadel appeared insurmountable, as the dreaded Mordred Brigade of the Red Claw, a force no man or hero had ever vanquished, seemed ready to plunder the crown of good Keetsos for their own power and fine cloths.

Slowly did Keetsos rise that morn, knowing he would soon have to abandon his people, and kneel before the supple bodice of Sirella, yet, as he opened the gates of his keep to surrender, he did not see the fearsome visage of the Mordred Brigade.

Instead, what he saw was a miracle. Ruinous and smoky were the smoking ruins of the Brigades machines of war. So total was their destruction, it was as if the Creator God Vulcos himself had brought them to their knees and axles.

As the tears of salvation welled up inside him, Gleek, the affable yet foppish jester son of the steward pointed skyward and said "Look, Look! It is our savior!"

And slowly did this new being descend on his Malthor Glide Jets. As He stood over the wondrous destruction he had undoubtedly wrought, the hearts of the people of Azural exploded in live and joy (some dying instantly from their fervor)

"Good mighty being, how may we repay you for our salvation?" Queried the aged king?

Yet this newcomer said nothing, he merely stood silent over the battlefield, his Chrome glistening in the sun and brining hope to even the most wretched beggar.

Finally, when the sorroful joy of the masses could grow no more, He spoke, "GO NOW, AND ENJOY YOUR FREEDOM AND TRADE AND FINE CLOTHS. I ASK ONLY FOR THE SUPPORT OF A BRAVE FEW, AS I MUST MAKE THIS WORLD SAFE FOR LOVE."

And with that, the glorious sentinel began to lift into the heavens, King Keetsos shouted one final exasperation:
"Wait, good sir, tell us, what is it you believe in? What is it you're fighting for?"

With a pause, the newcomer stopped:

"I BELIEVE IN THE HEART THAT HOPES FOR PEACE. I FIGHT SO THE INNOCENT WILL NOT KNOW THE SORROW OF WAR."

"ONE DAY MY NAME WILL CHANGE THE WORLD. I AM KPAX: VULCON SERIES. THE WARRIOR BOT"

And with that He was gone. The Wars of Power had finally ended. The Great Bot War had begun.

Holy Smokes

Michael Jordan was good:

Yikes

This is a fascinating read on Don Rumsfeld. as a rule, I'm always a little suspicious of any writing that unloads on someone like this, but this portion at the beginning was simply staggering to me:

on the morning of Thursday, April 10, 2003, Donald Rumsfeld’s Pentagon prepared a top-secret briefing for George W. Bush. This document, known as the Worldwide Intelligence Update, was a daily digest of critical military intelligence so classified that it circulated among only a handful of Pentagon leaders and the president; Rumsfeld himself often delivered it, by hand, to the White House. The briefing’s cover sheet generally featured triumphant, color images from the previous days’ war efforts: On this particular morning, it showed the statue of Saddam Hussein being pulled down in Firdos Square, a grateful Iraqi child kissing an American soldier, and jubilant crowds thronging the streets of newly liberated Baghdad. And above these images, and just below the headline secretary of defense, was a quote that may have raised some eyebrows. It came from the Bible, from the book of Psalms: “Behold, the eye of the Lord is on those who fear Him…To deliver their soul from death.”

This mixing of Crusades-like messaging with war imagery, which until now has not been revealed, had become routine. On March 31, a U.S. tank roared through the desert beneath a quote from Ephesians: “Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.” On April 7, Saddam Hussein struck a dictatorial pose, under this passage from the First Epistle of Peter: “It is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish men.”

This certainly falls under the "What the fuck were they thinking???" umbrella, and not in the good Joe Biden way.

What Is It You Believe In?

He died in the early days of the War of Power.
Only to be reborn in Bot form.
A body of steel and a heart of lightining.
He roams.
The unrighteous have no asslylum from his wrath.
The woman who streams.
The child who cries.
Have they not need of a protector as well?
Do they not need a Champion?
Born in the sorrowfull flains of gorgoroth,
Kaniecki was born.
Grown to be a great warrior,
and slain in battle.
In Good's time of most need,
DeMarr, famed biologist of the second age created
a frame of Power wrought steel and iron,
and the creator sent a breath of life into it,
That spirit was known as Kaniecki:
But now he is known only as,
Darkness's Bain:
KPax Vulcon Series
the Warrior Bot.

Sunday Reading

The government "gets" social media. The fact that this might take off by virtue of how terrible it is is some kind of reverse irony that I'm sure the Germans have a word for.

I really hope this is real:


Interesting, new;y discovered blog - The Smart Set

Go Blackhawks!