NFL Cracks Down On Creativity!

For those of you D10ers who are not avid football fans, you may have missed a couple of changes to the league over the past couple years. For one, C.K. Ndukwe is now the best and most popular player in the NFL. What's that Gingerballs!? Don't believe me? See the following videos as evidence.


In addition to Ndukwe's meteoric rise to stardom, the NFL replaced longtime commissioner Paul Taliagbue with the iron fisted Roger Goodell. In addition to suspending players for doing really sweet shit that we all secretly wish we could do (See: Making It Rain), the NFL shop has a list of 1,159 names that you aren't allowed to put on the back of your favorite team's jersey. "But Boots, isn't this a violation of the 1st Constitutional Amendment?" you ask. I don't know, I'm into football, not politics you tosser. I do know that there are a lot of names that I think we would all like to have on the back of our customized jersey, so we can wear it on the one day a week we are washing instead of wearing our Bengals 41. With that being said, here are Boots' top 25 names that you wish you could put on the back your customized jersey but can't because of Stalin Goodell.

ANAL ANNIE
ATHLETES FOOT
BAZOOMS
BM
CARRUTH
CUNNILINGUS
CYBERSLIMER
DAHMER
DICK FOR BRAINS
GAY MUTHA FUCKIN QUEER
GLAZED DONUT
GOT JESUS
LACTATE
LOLITA
LUCKY CAMEL TOE
PUBIC LICE
RED LIGHT
SEX TO GO
SHIT DICK
SKIN FLUTE
SPERMHERDER
SYPHILIS
TOILET BOWL
VULVA
WILLIE WANKER

I know, I know, it's a real load of pubic lice isn't it D10ers. But fear not, Boots has some suggestions that weren't on the list, and even a link for you to preview them here.
Boot's top 3 customized jersey selections
1.DickMeeting
2.Kenton (I know, I can hardly believe they let this one slip through)
3.Crank Job

Or screw it, just buy an Ndukwe alternate jersey