Making up for lost time

Seeing as we're still getting views without much new content, I feel I should step up in my slightly inebriated state. Haakon just left and I am sad.

Here are some Daily Charlotton newspaper headlines:

Ireland votes on European Union treaty: A beer in every hand and a potato in every garage

Edwards supports Obama, "Harvard Law is a mill, isn't it?"

Pakistan angry over American-led attack, tattles

Iran: Atomic program is "The bomb"

Tornado rips through Boy Scout camp, 'Screaming' merit badges earned

Hillary Clinton drops out of race, considers sex. Bill is 'kinda tired right now'

Mars rover retrieves soil sample, requests toilet paper

Corn prices rise, bunions steady

Maureen Dowd isn't funny

Dear Abby, I have the shits

And here's a great video: